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To celebrate autism acceptance month, I’m going to post something positive about autism every day through April.

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Earlier this month, I discussed my favorite movie ‘Mary & Max’. Today, I’d like to discuss my favorite TV series, ‘Community’. Or more specifically, I’d like to talk about my favorite character from that series, Abed Nadir:

To give you a quick introduction to the series in case you haven’t seen it; Community is a comedy sitcom about seven misfits forming a study group in community college while simultaneously forming the family that none of them had. We have the lazy smooth talker Jeff, the awkward political activist Britta, the bookworm Annie, the insensitive baby boomer Pierce, the mother figure Shirley, the overly emotional Troy and the autistic pop-culture fanatic Abed. The first season primarily focuses on Jeff, but they all share the spotlight in later seasons.

The premise is pretty basic, but the characters in this series are absolutely incredible. The brief description I just gave really doesn’t do it justice. They’re all some of the most fully developed and relatable characters I’ve ever seen in fiction. I could write an essay on why each of them is amazing, but I’ll focus on Abed for now.

Like I said, Abed is an autistic pop-culture fanatic. He’s particularly obsessed with television, so a large part of his dialogue is television references and meta humor. This could easily make him a shallow character, but it’s actually what makes him so interesting.

Abed always acts cool-headed and pretends that nothing bothers him. In reality, Abed has actually suffered quite a lot, he just doesn’t know how to express himself about it. That’s why he uses movies and pop-culture references to express himself instead. I don’t know about you guys, but I do the exact same thing to express myself, so I find this both funny and intensely relatable.

Abed has never had any real friends. Jeff calls him useful in the first episode and Abed says “that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me”. He casually mentions multiple times throughout the show that people would pretend to be his friends to make him buy things for them, then pushed him into a locker when they got tired of him. There is a whole episode (season 3, episode 16 ‘Virtual Systems Analysis’) where we delve into Abed’s psyche through a play-pretend game with Annie to show how much this actually traumatised him.

Annie: “Tell me where we are so I can pretend to see it.”

Abed: “We’re inside a locker. It’s where I spent a lot of time in junior high. It’s a place where people like me get put when everyone’s finally fed up with us.”

Abed’s relationship to his family was just as bad. His mother left because she couldn’t handle having an autistic kid and this made his dad emotionally abusive towards him. One of the first episodes (season 1, episode 3 ‘Introduction to Film’) is about Abed making a movie to his dad to show how much this actually hurt him. This is a beautiful episode and it’s one of my favorites in the series.

Abed’s dad: “I never said I blamed you for her leaving.”

Abed: “You never had to say it.”

Later in the show (season 5, episode 7 ‘Bondage and Beta Male Sexuality’) there is a new character named Hickey who puts Abed in handcuffs and rants about people being too nice to him. I think this episode is interesting, because it shows the ableist “autistic people are spoiled” mindset and how a lot of real life neurotypicals would react to someone like Abed.

Hickey: “What were you before this? Were you normal? Or do you act like this because somebody stuffed you into a locker? Is that the idea?”

Abed: “Other way around.”

It sounds like a very depressing show, but it’s actually not. You see, Abed quickly befriends Troy and the friendship that develops between them is absolutely beautiful. This is by far the sweetest, most genuine friendship I’ve seen in fiction.

Troy’s overly emotional fits is a perfect contrast to Abed’s calm and logical approach to stuff. They both help each other improve in so many ways. Troy used to be a simple football jock, but Abed helps him accept people who are different, while also letting Troy embrace his geeky side. Meanwhile, Troy helps Abed by becoming his first real friend and supporting him through his occasional meltdowns. The two moves in together in season 3 and their friendship just grows stronger in every episode. At one point, Troy saves Abed after he gets locked inside a locker again (season 4, episode 3 ‘Conventions of Space and Time’) and Abed responds with this:

Abed: ”You know, for the first time in my long history of being locked inside things, I knew someone would come.”

The rest of the study group (except maybe Pierce) also becomes genuine friends to Abed. While they occasionally make rude remarks about Abed’s robotic mannerisms, it’s clear that they all value and love him. He’s actually treated like an equal.

This is especially clear in Jeff and Abed’s relationship. Jeff was pretty shitty to Abed when they first met, even making fun of him for being autistic in the first episode. By the end of the show, Jeff can’t even picture himself living without Abed’s friendship and they share one of the most emotional scenes in the series. The series creator Dan Harmon has stated that Jeff and Abed’s friendship is the most important relationship in the series, because Abed is the one who indirectly teaches to Jeff to be a good person.

This also shows in Abed’s character development. Since Abed has finally found people who accept him, he has also gotten a lot more confident. He’s no longer ashamed of himself, he’s proud and happy to be his weird autistic self. There is an episode where the study group fails to get Abed a date (season 1, episode 17 ‘Physical Education’). The group is afraid that they’ve hurt Abed, until he gives these words of wisdom:

Britta: “So we didn’t damage your self-esteem or anything?”

Abed: “Britta, I’ve got self-esteem falling out of my butt. That’s why I was willing to change for you guys. Because when you really know who you are and what you like about yourself, changing for other people isn’t such a big deal.”

(By the way, Abed does get a really sweet romantic relationship later on)

As someone who has been bullied a lot for being different, seeing someone like me being accepted and loved on television just means so much. I found this series during one of the hardest parts of my life and I really don’t know if I would’ve made it without it. I have rewatched it about 8 times and I still rewatch episodes when I feel sad. It’s more than just an optimistic sitcom to me, I really do think that the kind messages and warmth of this series has the power to save lives. It’s my absolute favorite piece of fiction and Abed is my absolute favorite fictional character.

On a side note, there are obviously some jokes about Abed being autistic, but it’s never done in an offensive or insulting way. I actually think these jokes will be more funny for autistic people. Jokes like this are relatable and hilarious to me:

So how can Abed be such a well-written character when neurotypicals always struggle to write autistic people? Well, because he wasn’t written by a neurotypical. Tomorrow, I’ll be talking about the autistic writer and my personal idol, Dan Harmon.

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Happy April to all autistic and neurodiverse people! I hope you all have a wonderful month.

(Day 27/30, follow #aprilautismpositivity for more)